Page 78 - SCAT Rural Voice II - 35 Stories for 35 Years

Gender
Thandanani Self Help Group.
MY LOnG WALK to freedom
Bomikazi Mhlongo Coordinator of Flagstaff Advice Office Nompumelelo Mankayi. working on one of her cases.
YOLANDA GWIjI, AN ADVICE OFFICE FIELDWORKER, WRITES ABOUT HER LIFE’S jOURNEY THAT BEGAN WHEN SHE MET HER HUSBAND WHILE CARRYING WATER TO THE RIVER. AFTER A FEW DIFFICULT YEARS OF MARRIAGE, SHE LEARNT THAT SHE NEEDED TO WORK SO THAT SHE WAS NOT SOLELY DEPENDENT ON A MAN. THIS IS A LESSON WHICH SHE HAS USED TO HELP MANY WOMEN REGAIN THEIR DIGNITY AND SURVIVE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE.
I am a 49-year-old widow from the land of amaPondo, Spaqeni village in Flagstaff, eastern Cape. If you ask me to describe myself, I would say I am a loving, talkative person who is always willing to help and advise others. A mother of three, I am blessed with one grandchild.
I met my late husband on my way to get water from the river. He greeted me and I responded. He then asked me for directions to the school to see his brother-in-law. I later learnt that he told his brother-in-law that he had found the girl who was going to be his wife. We met again and that is when he asked me to marry him. I agreed.
While he was still alive my husband worked part time for construction companies. unfortunately, he was an excessive drinker, so we didn’t have enough money for our household needs. I had to ask him for permission to start looking for a job as it was hard and painful being dependent on a man. It was not easy, but he agreed. My first job was at a supermarket in town. After a short while I had to let go of the job to be closer to my children.
I then joined as a volunteer at the Vusisizwe AIdS awareness and Human rights nGO as a care giver. I don’t know what they saw in me but a lot of women came to me for advice about their marriage issues before I even started working at the advice center. In 2009 I was asked by the nGO management to organize Operation Thetha Nje, a women empowerment/development programme to fight for women’s & children’s rights and freedom of speech.
yolAndA GwiJi
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RuRal Voice ii: 35 stories for 35 years